Men’s mental health: 6 signs of substance abuse

Intro

Men’s mental health is still a taboo subject and I’m here to change that. Today I want to talk about something that’s not often talked about with men’s mental health. Substance abuse issues. A lot of the time we turn to substances as temporary relief to escape our mental health problems. Substance abuse can be drugs or alcohol and not just illegal drugs either. A lot of the time when we’re struggling with substance abuse issues, we don’t really know it ourselves or we’re in denial.

In this blog post, I’m going to talk about signs that you could be struggling with substance abuse issues. The signs listed are all from my own personal experience and I share a bit about my experience. If you’d like to understand more about my journey with drugs and alcohol, please check out my story here.

The first time you used a substance

Now, I’m sure you can remember the first time you got drunk or high? I certainly can. It was a feeling like no other. It seemed to make all our worries disappear for a short period of time, followed by a nasty hangover or a dirty comedown. Although we said things like ‘I’ll never do that again’, those thoughts were short-lived, as we’d go and do it all again the next weekend and the weekend after that.

For a lot of people drinks or drugs is a big part of growing up. For the majority, it never negatively affects them. However, for some people, myself included the substances we began experimenting with start to have a hold over us and we begin to abuse them. This is often because we’ve started struggling in our day-to-day lives. Be it relationship problems or mental health problems. We turn to the substances that offer us temporary relief in the form of escaping our reality as they seem to make all our problems disappear. And this can happen without us even realizing it. We begin using substances more and more to suppress our thoughts and feelings. Before we know it, we can’t function without them.

Before I continue, I just want to add that there is nothing wrong with struggling with substance abuse issues. There is no shame in it, and together we can get better. But, if you know deep down that you have a problem, then the first step on the road to recovery is admitting it to yourself. If you want to change, you must do it for yourself! Not because someone is telling you to. Trust me, that never works.

5 signs you’re struggling with substance abuse

1. You want to escape reality

A sign that you’re beginning to struggle with substance abuse is wanting to escape reality. When we become increasingly unhappier in our day-to-day lives, we use substances to escape and forget our problems. The only problem is, this never works, it only makes it worse! Substances may offer short-term relief, but our problems keep mounting up, not disappearing. As your problems rise so does your need to escape reality, and so you begin to use more & more of your chosen substance to get the same effect. Often, you can do this without really realising you’re abusing substances, as it’s the only way you know how to cope with what’s going on.  

My experience:

When I was at my lowest point, I was constantly using Xanax and alcohol to ‘escape my reality’. I was so unhappy with my life and found my problems too daunting to face, so I didn’t. I buried my head in the sand and got wasted. It started with me just using substances at the weekend, but as my need to escape quickly grew, weekend use turned into everyday use. If you’re feeling the need to escape reality, remember using drugs and alcohol never works, it only makes your problems worse!

2. You hide your substance use

People who have struggled with substance abuse issues for a while often know what they’re doing is wrong and they’re ashamed of their behavior, so they hide their use from everyone else. You start to avoid seeing your friends so you can sit alone getting wasted or withdrawing from family activities so you can get high alone. If your friends and family begin to question your substance use, you’ll lie to their face so they don’t worry and try even harder to hide your use.

My experience:

Towards the end of my substance abuse issues, I was constantly hiding my drug use, not so much the drinking. I was ashamed that I was dependent on Xanax, and I wanted everyone to believe that I wasn’t taking it anymore, so I told them I’d stopped taking it and hid it. Rather than going out with my pals and having a good time, I sat in my room and got high by myself alienating myself from the world. It was a very dark and lonely time in my life. But remember, there is always light at the end of the tunnel!

3. You lie to your friends & family about substance use

This ties in with sign 2. Often when you’re struggling with substance abuse, your friends and family start to notice and get worried. Rather than admitting you have a problem or that you’re struggling, you lie to them so they’re not worried and begin to hide your use around them. You make sure they only ever see ‘sober’ you, so they believe that you haven’t got a problem.

My experience:

During my struggle with substance abuse, my family began noticing that I was using substances more and more. They tried talking to me about it multiple times, but I always denied that I had problems. I blamed my excessive use on the fact that I was young. I told them that it was nothing to worry about as everyone my age was doing it. It caused me to worry that they were concerned about me, so I hid it from them. After that, I tried to make sure they never saw me wasted. So,I’d only come home when I knew they were in bed or didn’t come home at all. This only led to them worrying more and resulted in horrible arguments and fallouts as I was constantly bullshitting them.

4. Your finances are impacted by substance use

As your substance use increases, you need more & more to get the same affects you once were. This nearly always has a negative impact on your finances as drugs and alcohol are not fucking cheap, especially if you’re using daily! As you begin needing more, you start buying your substances first, rather than worrying about buying your food or paying your rent.

My experience:

From a young age, I’ve always worked and had enough money in the bank to do what I wanted, within reason. But, as I got more and more dependent on substances, my finances suffered because of it. I blew my savings on drugs and got to the point where my monthly pay cheque would be gone a few days after getting it. This led to me borrowing money I couldn’t pay back or taking drugs on credit I couldn’t afford. As some of you may know, that is never a good idea! I put myself in a lot of debt which only added to the problems I already had. It took me years to recover financially.

5. Your behaviour is becoming more dangerous i.e., driving under the influence

Substance abuse can often lead to dangerous behaviour. As you become more and more dependent on substances, day-to-day activities become increasingly harder to do, so you do them whilst under the influence. Not only do you put yourself at risk, but you’re also putting other people at risk.

My experience:

As my substance use increased my behaviour became more & more dangerous. I started putting myself into situations where I could have got extremely hurt, just to sort some drugs out. Or I’d drink so much that I’d wake up with a smashed-up face, concussion, and no idea how any of it happened to me. Unfortunately, I also put my friends in dangerous situations too. Normally because I’d done something that resulted in us having a fight or getting our stuff stolen.

6. You experience withdrawal symptoms

If you’ve abused substances for a while, you can start to experience withdrawals when you’re not using them. Withdrawal symptoms vary depending on the substance being abused. But most mild withdrawal symptoms include anxiety, irritability, inability to sleep, or nausea. Severe symptoms can include seizures or hallucinations.

My experience:

My experience with drugs and alcohol led to me trying to quit them all cold turkey. This led to me having intense withdrawals which resulted in me having a full-blown mental breakdown and seizure. I lost my job because of the seizure and spent the best part of a year recovering from my addictions.

Conclusion

Men’s mental health and substance abuse issues are often related. These issues affect millions of people worldwide. But the good thing is, they’re issues that you will overcome! If you’ve read this blog post and you’re worried you’re struggling with substance abuse, please do not ignore that fact. Take this opportunity to admit to yourself that you’re struggling and need some help. There is no shame in it. The first step on your road to recovery is admitting your problems to yourself. From there you can and will get better! It might be a long journey, but it will be the best journey you have ever been on.

Remember: the only way is up!

Helpful services in the UK:

Catch 22

If you’re under 25, living in the UK, and struggling with substance abuse issues please reach out to Catch 22. Catch 22 is a free service that can help people under the age of 25 struggling with substance abuse. They’re bloody brilliant and helped me get sober! Visit their website here: https://www.catch-22.org.uk/

Samaritans

If you want to talk to someone about your problems but aren’t ready to talk to your friends or family, please give the Samaritans a call. They’re a free support service for people who are struggling, and they’re there to listen to you with no judgment. Their number is 116 123. Visit their website here: https://www.samaritans.org/